In Memory of My Mother, Bronnie Willner a'h

Some Thoughts בראנא אסתר ב' ר' דוד ע"ה לעילוי נשמת

Whose yahrzeit was yesterday, שבת,י"ב ניסן

Unity

The בריח התיכון was an interior cross-beam of cedar wood that went through the קרשים, which formed the outer perimeter of the משכן. חז"ל teach us that Yaakov אבינו commanded the שבטים to plant cedar trees in Egypt for the קרשים, but he himself took charge of the בריח, personally bringing the wood for it from ארץ ישראל.

The Maharal explains that the קרשים represent the twelve שבטים of כלל ישראל; there were 48 קרשים, 4 for each שבט. The total length of the קרשים was 70 אמות, the total number of כלל ישראל that went down to מצרים.

Yaakov was the first of the אבות privileged to have all his descendants become a part of כלל ישראל. He is thus the force that brings unity to כלל ישראל. The מדה of Yaakov is אחדות. The בריח, which held the קרשים together, symbolizes the unity of כלל ישראל. It is thus apropos that Yaakov, himself, supply the בריח.

We know that מעשה אבות סימן לבנים and it is a fact that throughout the generations, כלל ישראל, and the individual families within כלל ישראל, maintained an unusual degree of unity and cohesiveness, despite all the travails that we were subjected to – צרות that usually lead to disunity and fractionalization. 

שמחות. She sponsored annual get-togethers at her summer home to make sure that the cousins got to know each other. She arbitrated any disagreements that arose and insisted that they be settled equitably.

May we learn from her example, and may she be a מליצה ישרה  for her descendants, and for the entire extended family.

The Art of Persuasion

When the time came for Aharon to take over the עבודה in the Mishkan, Hashem told Moshe, קח את אהרון, take Aharon. Rashi explains that this means קחנו בדברים, take him with words – in other words, convince him to accept the role.

The Maharal explains that it is impossible to “take” a person by force; a person is defined by his דעת, his mind, and no matter what happens to a person physically, his דעת, his opinion, is impervious to force. That is why, when acquiring an object by משיכה, moving it, one can use a verbal summons to induce an animal to move, thereby acquiring it – that counts as משיכה – but one cannot acquire an עבד כנעני that way. When you summon a person, even if he obliges you by moving toward you, it is because his דעת intervened and it is what he wants to do. Your summons is not the direct inducement for his motion. Whereas an animal does not exercise independent judgment to decide whether or not to listen to you. Your summons directly caused the animal to move and that is sufficient for a משיכה acquisition.

the role of כהן גדול but it was Aharon’s דעת that caused him to accept it. This is a good rule of thumb when attempting to convince someone to do something – the most effective approach is to convince them that it is what they, themselves, want to do.

Bubby Willner excelled in this מדה. She had well thought out beliefs about what was right and wrong; appropriate and inappropriate. But she did not attempt to foist them on others. Rather, she discussed and reasoned, and accepted the other person’s decision with grace, even if their דעת did not coincide with her דעת. She acknowledged the autonomy of her family members and the people around her and was content to make her point and let them decide what they would do.

May we all learn from Bubby’s example in our dealings with our own family members and others, and may she be a מליצה ישרה  for her descendants, and for the entire extended family.